Turn and face the change

People ask me all the time, "How is married life?"

It's pretty annoying actually. But that's probably because I hate small talk.

Married life is fine. It's great. It's lovely. It's pretty much exactly the same.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy calling Jeff my husband. That's a perk. I tried it out for a few months, though, before I actually did get married, to random people I'd never see again, or people over the phone. I used it for the first time in England when Jeff put the parking break on while we were driving. "Miss," I said to a woman standing outside her cul de sac home. "My husband is a moron, can you help us?"

My husband is not a moron, for the record. But things haven't changed that much. Oh, I've put on 10 of the 20 pounds I lost. Jeff and I have made up for months of dieting with a few months of gorging. It's hard to lose weight without a big to-do like a wedding to get your butt in gear. I'm currently accepting applications for motivating events.

I love seeing Jeff with his wedding ring on. When he has it on. He likes to play with it, move it around in his hands, drop it on the floor. Drives me nuts. I say, "You can't lose it if you don't take it off." I suspect we'll learn that lesson the hard way some day.

I suppose the argument for not living with each other before you get married is just for this reason. That nothing changes. Of course, I would never go back and time and take away all Jeff and I experienced in our three years of living together. We've learned a lot about each other.

For instance, Jeff learned that I don't like to clean. I learned that Jeff doesn't like to clean. We learned that our house would probably never ever be clean, unless motivated by someone coming over, or a stench in the kitchen sink.

We learned that it was impossible to share one blanket. His body temperature is much higher than mine, plus I steal the blanket. That's why we have two. Just normal married life.

Perhaps a smooth transition was best. Neither of us like change all that much.

Getting married was just the first step for our many goals. Get married. Get a house. Find jobs we love (I have, he hasn't). See Italy. See Hawaii. See France, Spain, Germany. Maybe along the way have a ... no, mom, not yet.

So nothing's changed. Except that my life has started. Except that I'm officially an adult now. Except that the man I love more than anything agreed to stay with me forever.

Other than that, status quo.

How have the last three months of your life been?