Turn and face the change

People ask me all the time, "How is married life?"

It's pretty annoying actually. But that's probably because I hate small talk.

Married life is fine. It's great. It's lovely. It's pretty much exactly the same.

Don't get me wrong, I enjoy calling Jeff my husband. That's a perk. I tried it out for a few months, though, before I actually did get married, to random people I'd never see again, or people over the phone. I used it for the first time in England when Jeff put the parking break on while we were driving. "Miss," I said to a woman standing outside her cul de sac home. "My husband is a moron, can you help us?"

My husband is not a moron, for the record. But things haven't changed that much. Oh, I've put on 10 of the 20 pounds I lost. Jeff and I have made up for months of dieting with a few months of gorging. It's hard to lose weight without a big to-do like a wedding to get your butt in gear. I'm currently accepting applications for motivating events.

I love seeing Jeff with his wedding ring on. When he has it on. He likes to play with it, move it around in his hands, drop it on the floor. Drives me nuts. I say, "You can't lose it if you don't take it off." I suspect we'll learn that lesson the hard way some day.

I suppose the argument for not living with each other before you get married is just for this reason. That nothing changes. Of course, I would never go back and time and take away all Jeff and I experienced in our three years of living together. We've learned a lot about each other.

For instance, Jeff learned that I don't like to clean. I learned that Jeff doesn't like to clean. We learned that our house would probably never ever be clean, unless motivated by someone coming over, or a stench in the kitchen sink.

We learned that it was impossible to share one blanket. His body temperature is much higher than mine, plus I steal the blanket. That's why we have two. Just normal married life.

Perhaps a smooth transition was best. Neither of us like change all that much.

Getting married was just the first step for our many goals. Get married. Get a house. Find jobs we love (I have, he hasn't). See Italy. See Hawaii. See France, Spain, Germany. Maybe along the way have a ... no, mom, not yet.

So nothing's changed. Except that my life has started. Except that I'm officially an adult now. Except that the man I love more than anything agreed to stay with me forever.

Other than that, status quo.

How have the last three months of your life been?

At the Movies with Emily and Jeff: The Invention of Lying

I love pretty much everything Ricky Gervais does. I pretty much kiss the ground he walks on. Extras, the Office, the podcasts he does -- brilliant. These few hours of TV/radio are probably 50% of the hardest laughs I've ever had in my life. We're also going to see his standup in November at the NYC comedy festival.

So when his first ever movie was coming out -- yeah, I was going to be going to see that opening night. (Thanks Jackie and Andrew for joining us!)

Now, I wasn't that psyched on the trailer. In fact, I thought the trailer looked downright disappointing. But I know that Ricky doesn't always love to go all out on comedy, he can get serious and messagey in his delivery (see: Extras and Office finale) which can be great. So I was kind of hoping that was the deal here.

(Here's where we pick up spoilers, so don't read on if you don't want to know main plot points. There's really no twists in this movie, so you're probably OK.)

Though the trailers cleverly disguised it, this was a movie about atheism. Ricky Gervais is an outspoken atheist, obviously it's an area where we differ. As the man who figures out how to lie, he tells his mother on her deathbed that there's no reason to be afraid to die, because there's a big man in the sky, and all your loved ones, and you live in a mansion and you're happy forever. After he says this, word spreads about "new information about what happens after you die" and he becomes famous.

It's not subtle, what he does here. And that's fine. It's fair. I think he presents it honestly: religion and God (not mutually exclusive), whether you believe in It or not, is something that can give many people great comfort in times of sadness. It can also cause people to do things or act a certain way based only on what they believe might happen after they die. Is that right? Of course it all depends on what they're doing. In this movie, for example, Ricky's two friends are alcoholics and loners, who don't care about improving their current lot in life because they're just waiting for their mansion in the sky.

I'm not going to get into the religious implications, because it just comes down to a difference of opinion. He's definitely being "blasphemous" and he toes the line of being disrespectful for disrespectufulness sake, but since I knew the subject matter going in, I wasn't wildly offended. I've always taken my faith as something I chose, I believe in, that gives ME comfort, and will agree to disagree with everyone who feels differently.

OK -- moving on. Is the movie good? Yes, it's good. It's not great. I think movies are destined to fall short when they hang on such an absolute -- a word where no one lies. But, really, it's not just a world where no one lies -- it's a world where everyone tells you the honest truth and has no filter. And that's for comic effect, but sometimes it is just too much. A lot of the same jokes and lines are used over and over, and I think it could have used a slight rewrite to smooth the bumps in the writing. The acting is good, the cameos by some great actors is fantastic (including one you'll never expect!). The storyline between Ricky and Jennifer Garner's character is a bit strange, it doesn't quite work given that Garner's character seems to have a one track mind. She's almost like a robot.

There's one scene in the movie that makes it worth it. Ricky's reading his version of the 10 commandments (off pizza boxes no less) and I laughed so hard at a few of the moments I almost cried. I wish there had been more of that.

Overall, it's a little too soapboxy, not quite funny enough to make up for it, and falls short of it's HUGE objective... it feels a little false. Ironically.

Final ranking: Two and a half Werschaibles.

Off my shoulders

Well I'm no SJP or Charlize Theron, natch. But here's what I came up with...

Apologize for the terrrrible pics. The Werschaible camera is crap and I've never mastered the art of the self-portrait.

Obvs, not that short. My hairdresser recommended against it. I believe she used the word, "poodle." I don't even own a hairdryer so this was probably the way to go. Lo-maintenence. Curl tastic. Jeff friendly?

New wave

Ever since I got married, I've sort of been dying to cut my hair. It's not uncommon, they have a phrase for it, the "post-wedding chop." Most women grow their hair out for their weddings, and thus have no reason to keep it so long after the wedding is over.

I've been wearing my hair long for years now. The shortest it's been was last September, when I got it cut to this length:

And now, almost a year later, with almost no length cut off... probably close to 6-8 inches longer.

So I'm sick of this hair. I'm sick of my whole look, if I'm being honest. I can't wait to buy a new pair of glasses, but that's a whole 'nother story (Can I pull off this thick frame madness? I think it looks cool on everyone else. On me I'm afraid it will look wonky. Stay tuned).

I want to cut it all off. Shorter than I've had it in years, probably dating back to sixth grade, when I got a perm ;) We don't need a perm, my hair is curly enough as it is and THICK, so who knows what will happen in I cut it. Will it curl better? Be bouncy and cute? Or will it frizz out or lay flat against my head?

One thing's for sure: Jeff's dead-set against it. He does not want me to cut my hair at all! Poor guy, I'm disappointing him already.

My thought was maybe to donate my hair to Locks of Love, but I'm not sure I have the 10 inches they require. They also say the hair can't have been highlighted, and mine has. I might send it to them anyway, as it says on their site that they can sell the hair they don't use to offset the cost of the wigs. We'll see.

I've been perusing the internets for a few days to find some cute, shortish haircuts for wavy hair, and I'm afraid I'm not having much luck. Unfortunately, most of what comes up is from celebrities, and their hair looks great because they spend time blow drying and styling, etc. I haven't blown-out my hair myself in more than two years. I don't really feel like starting.

Here's what I've found that I don't HATE.

As always, this is the time for honesty. And if you know any good sites for hairstyles, let me know. What I've found so far for examples is pretty dismal.

When your heart was an open book

Lest you think I've been sitting on my butt since the honeymoon, staring out the window, longing to wear the white dress once again... I haven't. But I have.

Quick recap of what's gone down since the honeymoon. Then we get back to the irregular regular schedule of my thoughts.

• Pats training camp: Went the day after we got back. Met up with AFCE blogger Tim for a chat.
• Concerts: First, Paul McCartney concert at Fenway: Awesome Awesome. He played for over two hours. He still has it.

Had this exchange though, with an elderly gentleman who sat next to me. (This was while Jeff went to go get me some water.)

Him (with no sarcasm, or condescentment ? in his voice): "You know, Paul McCartney used to be in a band."

Me (in disbelief): "Yeah, I know. I just got back from Liverpool." (Holds up my Liverpool sweatshirt).

Him (again, no sarcasm): "Liverpool!? That's where the Beatles are from!"

We continue this exchange of him throwing B-level Beatles trivia at me while I answer him right back. Yeah sir, Pete Best, Stuart Sutcliffe, Wings, Linda McCartney -- I KNOW!

Finally...

Him: "Wait a second..... Do you go to Berkley? I'm not talking the Beatles with a music major am I?!"

Me: blank stare.

--Fin--

The Killers: Went last Friday, a wedding present from our friend Mike. I am such a fangirl for them. Definitely my favorite band... ever?

• Movies movies movies. One line reviews.

Away We Go: Saw this before the wedding and absolutely LOVED it. Three-and-a-half Werschaibles.

District 9: Best movie of the year. Four Werschaibles.

Inglorious Basterds: Might be my second favorite movie of the year. Four Werschaibles.

Julie and Julia: Oops, sorry Jeff. Two Werschaibles (On a side note, I did start reading the chick's old blog and the movie does it no justice. Her blog is genuinely entertaining!)

500 Days of Summer: Jeff and I both were disappointed. Two and a half Werschaibles.

Did I miss any babe?

• TV: We are now all caught up on How I Met Your Mother (hooked) and we also breezed right through the first two seasons of True Blood (I have a weakness for non-Twilight related vampire schtick.) Working our way through the third season of Dexter.

Now I'm in the midst of name changing baloney, writing thank you cards (a lot harder than I thought), choosing wedding photos, trying to get the house together and trying even less hard to get back to the gym.

More on my life upcoming. Working from the present, not the past...

Wedding Highlight video!

Untitled from Emily Schaible on Vimeo.

A few disclaimers...

1. No, I did not ask him to put that sesame street clip in (I've piqued your interest now) Yes, I think it's silly.
2. Jeff lost his voice so his voice is not normally so high. Yes, we both cringe when we hear our vows :)
3. I asked him to include a lot of the toasts because they were my favorite part!

4. No, there were no fireworks.

Enjoy!

And now it's time to say goodbye

And here we are. Day 8, the last day of our honeymoon. The last of a... 14 part? wedding series. I hope you've enjoyed it as much as I haven't.

Kidding.

This was perhaps one of our most jam-packed days. We started off, at 10 a.m., after breakfast... well I guess I have to back up to that. Because -- can you believe it -- my husband was coerced into trying HAGGIS! I think I've mentioned here before about how picky Jeff is, and I don't think I need to get into what exactly haggis is, but even I didn't want to try it. The lady at the B&B insisted that if you come to Scotland you might as well try it, and he even gave it 3 or 4 bites! I wouldn't say he liked it, but I'm proud he gave it a shot.

Anyways, first stop on our last day was Mary King's Close. You may, or may not know, that Edinburgh was sort of built from the bottom up, leaving a whole system of underground "closes" that supposedly were for lower-class people and got really grimey, especially around the plague. MKC is supposedly the best one to tour and we did, complete with an appropriately dressed Scottish tour guide who bordered on unintelligible, but in a camp, fun way. I wasn't thrilled about going, as these Close's have all sorts of haunted connotations, and are dimly lit, which is hard to navigate for someone like me, who's eyes don't function. But Jeff insisted, and I agreed, as long as we could go during the day.

The tour was fun, no pictures I'm afraid, they weren't allowed, and we unearthed to head over to Edinburgh Castle.

Jeff bought a tour book and was my tour guide for the day :)

And honorary Scotsman.

And King Schaibleous the Rambunctious.

And just... be careful ok?
After we left the castle we headed out to the street and over to the Camera Obscura, which is basically a museum of illusions, which was fun and a good way to kill time. At this point, I needed some rest so we headed off the Royal Mile to go relax in the B&B for a while before our last dinner.

We headed over to a place called "The Basement" and ordered two steak and ale pies, two hard ciders (then two more, then one more ;) and then a sticky toffee pudding. It was another great night, and a good sendoff to the honeymoon.

A subtext of our honeymoon was me stopping at internet cafes twice a day to check to see if we'd gotten any wedding teasers. On our very last chance of the honeymoon, we stopped at a cafe... and they were up!!! (Here's a link to the teasers and wedding slideshow if you want.) What a great capper for the night to be able to swoon over the pics.

We got up early the next morning and got the airport no problem. We had an 11-hour travel day, which was exhausting, but we arrived in Boston in the early evening where my earth angel Meg picked us up and drove us home.

Our land in Boston smooch. Greasy, tired and happy.

And back to real life.

Thanks for reading ya'll. Here's some links back to my entire wedding series should you decide at some point you have no life.

Part I -- The Rehearsal Dinner.

Part II -- Wedding Day: Getting ready.

Part III -- Wedding Day: Pre-ceremony.

Part IV -- Wedding Day: The ceremony!

Part V -- Wedding Day: Post-ceremony and the toasts.

Part VI -- Wedding Day: The reception.

Part VII -- The post-wedding brunch.

Part VIII -- Honeymoon (London) Day 1: Flight, Trafalgar Square, Harrod's.

Part IX -- Honeymoon (London) Day 2: London Tower, the Globe and Gordon Ramsay's.

Part X -- Honeymoon (London) Day 3: Abbey Road, Buckingham Palace, Big Ben, Parliament, Les Mis!

Part XII -- Honeymoon (Cotswolds) Day 4+5: Benz'in, Relaxin', Castle-n'

Part XIII -- Honeymoon (Liverpool + Edinburgh) Day 6+7: Beatlemania, BK and the Crags.

Part XIV -- Honeymoon (Edinburgh) Day 8 -- Edinburgh Castle and going home.

OK, I didn't even realize there were that many posts....